STYLE & CONFIDENCE, by Shivani Patiar, Personal Stylist

Updated: Nov 30

We know midlife can be full of unexpected challenges and often our body shape is something that experiences big, unwanted changes! Finding half your wardrobe no longer fits, seemingly overnight, can come as a shock and really knock our self confidence. So as party season fast approaches we have called upon the advice of our fabulous stylist and colour expert friend, Shivani Patiar.

Shivani is a qualified personal stylist with over 20 years of experience working in the fashion, beauty and retail industries. She is a big believer of using colour with clothes to help boost happiness. Shivani helps her clients get the most wear out of their wardrobes and is passionate about sustainability. Thank you Shivani! Trudie & Vicky x


At any stage of life, you can hit a wall where things that had always felt quite normal, suddenly feel terribly overwhelming. Often for women, this can coincide with when they hit Perimenopause or the Menopause itself.

It’s terribly easy to feel like you want to hide away in your bed until this phase of life is over. Although these days we have better knowledge of it and available medicines as well as alternative therapies, I’m also a big fan of self-help books, self-care is proven to improve your disposition. Alongside fitness and great nutrition, I’m a huge advocate of dressing to improve your mood and confidence.

Having spent 20 years of my life working in Fashion and Retail, it’s easy to see the power of the right clothing and the effect it has on YOU…not for anyone else, but how it makes YOU feel. Although perfectly logical, it takes just as much time and effort to dress badly as it does to dress well, however, two very different outcomes…one makes us want to give up on our day, the other gives us the power to feel like you can achieve it all.

As Bill Cuningham said, “Fashion is the armour to survive the reality of everyday life”. I work with Women, Men, and children of all ages to help them identify and express their own Personal Style. People often ask me what the difference is between Fashion and Style. Ultimately Fashion can be seasonal, and trend led, whereas style is more classic, unique to you and I use a whole host of processes to help identify it with you.

We look at elements like your body shape together. This is often hard for women due to the many life stages that we go through e.g., Pregnancy, middle age, Menopause. Confidence starts with self-love, but that also means embracing our bodies just as they are with all the bumps, curves scars that tell their own life story of you. Once we know your body shape, we find clothing that helps balance proportions, flatter your shape beautifully allowing yourself to fall in love with yourself.

I also consider life stage and lifestyle to help determine your style personality. Are you more of a boho dresser, or minimalistic preferring simple, clean lines? This allows you to be more focussed with new purchases going forward.

Harnessing the power of colour is psychologically proven to boost mood and confidence. At times when mood is low, it’s so easy to cloak up in black or grey and feel like you want to hide away from the world. However, I highly recommend embracing colour due to the strength of energy and uplifting ability held within them.

Gone are the days where you need to feel stuck in a rut or like you need to fit in with your style. In any case, these will make you feel more vulnerable. So, shine bright and don’t be afraid to stand out. Remember Coco Chanel said, “Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman”.

Email: | Instagram: @ShivStyles

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