How to be grateful (even when you don’t feel it!)

Gratitude. It can be a hard thing to feel sometimes. Being grateful isn’t always easy, harder still when it feels like life is just throwing you lemons. The worst is being TOLD you should be grateful, because sometimes you just don’t feel it. Full stop!

When it feels hard it’s usually because we are starting from a position of comparison. When we compare ourselves or our situation to others we are not focussing on the ‘haves’ that exist in that moment, only what we feel our circumstance is lacking in that moment. This is dangerous ground, as there will ALWAYS be someone with perceived ‘more’ or ‘better’ and that is OK! That’s absolutely fine - good for them. Because I can tell you now, you have all that you need, you just need to know how to see it.

There is a line in a movie my children loved when they were young called Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, it includes the classic line, ‘if you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.’ Ferris Bueller wasn’t wrong. But all too often we are heads down, ploughing on trying to ‘get things done’, that we forget that life is happening around us, we forget to stop and smell the roses! So, let’s do that - right now! When you’ve finished reading this blog, close your eyes, take a breath and settle into the moment. Be aware of how you feel, where you are sitting, what you can hear, smell, feel. You have access to technology that helps keep you connected, electricity and money to pay the bills. You are safe, warm, fed, watered - you are alive! 

Practicing mindfulness can help lead us to gratitude. And this is a good thing. Not just because being grateful can help reframe a negative situation, the act of expressing gratitude can also help us feel better. When we express gratitude and receive the same, our brain releases dopamine and serotonin, the two crucial neurotransmitters responsible for our emotions, and they make us feel 'good'. They enhance our mood immediately, making us feel happy from the inside.*

Here are a few tips to help you find gratitude today:

1. Today - write down 5 - 10 things you are grateful for today - do this every day!
2. Volunteering - helping others and giving back is a great way of finding perspective and appreciating what YOU have right now.
3. Notice the little things - appreciate the little things around you - the sun is shining and warm on your face. You found a crumpled £5 note in your pocket, the lady in the coffee shop gave you a freebie, your favourite programme is on the TV tonight...

Wishing you a fabulous October. See you next month.
Lots of love, Zoë xx

* Source: positiveneurology.com / Photo Credit: Gabrielle Henderson unsplash.com